Returning

[New Spots at the Ol’ Resort]

In meditation, we often remind ourselves to return to the breath. When the mind wanders, we notice, and with a bit of friendliness, simply return to the breath. Over and over and over. Sometimes it can seem frustrating to repeat a thing you feel like you should know by now. But then again, you may find something new.

We have found ourselves doing a lot of returning “home,” whether it be to Austin & San Antonio, college towns in the midwest or to our Cincinnati roots. We also returned for Workamping jobs at Three Rivers Resort in Colorado this summer. A big group of friends even reunited for a recent wedding. New horizons reach out to us for the new year, but for now we look at the feeling of returning. Sometimes this has felt like going backwards on a journey where we set out to see unexplored places. We look around at first and there’s an urge to compare to how it was before. 

“Sheesh! So crowded in this valley!”
“Can you even see the Frost Tower anymore?”
“Last time it felt more like a community.”
“Was traffic always this bad?”
“I can’t believe __________ is gone.”
“Billboards, radar traps and potholes! Oh my!”
“Is this Crested Butte or Vail?”
“They have Starbucks now? So much for local.”
“I had no idea they felt that way.”
“$20 for used shoes?! Thrifting is a lot less thrifty!”

And then we realize, it is also us that have changed. And how we see the world. 

[This Ol’ Crew Getting Together Again]

[It’s Nice to Meet You, Babeh!]

There have been times we had a preference for hiking loop trails over out & back trails. Who wants to walk the same path you just did? But, the views on the way back can be suddenly different. When we seek with fresh eyes…

“Butler’s course sure is looking green.”
“Look how much more confidence they have now.”
“Woah! The river is high this year! Should be fun!”
“I like this new exhibit. I’d never thought about art in the garden that way before.”
“Hey! You’re a new-to-me kid/pet. Glad to finally meet ya!”
“Finally made it up Rustler’s Gulch and saw moose. Awesome!”
“I forgot how beautiful all the colors are in autumn.”
“Well, this coffee shop was a good find!”
“I really dig how this community gathers for their fall harvest.”
“I have missed you. And it is just so good to see you again.”

[Always So Good to See You]

So of course, returning doesn’t truly mean repeating or going backwards. It’s just that comparison and expectation can sometimes breed disappointment. Returning to the breath, returning to mindfulness helps us let go of that initial feeling. Then our thoughts may be more open to the fresh joys found on the way back. And we acknowledge and honor the growth we see around us and within. When we think of our past selves living at all these times and places along the way, it would’ve been hard for 10/20/30-year-old Khara & Jesse to have imagined the choices we’d make and the life we would build. Reflection can reorient us and help us feel gratitude both for our life today and beyond. Won’t it be fascinating to look back a decade from now to where we are today? Hopefully, we’ll see!

“You get lost and keep coming back. This is what’s supposed to happen.” Pema Chödron

And now for some fall colors…